Sunday, October 29, 2006
Why I'm a Breastfeeing Bee-otch
Why I am a Breastfeeding B*tch
*Each parent has a myriad of choices when they enter into this whole parenthood thing. As my husband and I entered into parenthood with our first (and currently only) child, I began to realize the lack of grrrl power behind the idea of breastfeeding. I am a breastfeeding advocate, who does her best each day in regards to raising a capable and compassionate son, being a productive world citizen, and being a fun person to be around. This essay was written to help me put my feelings into words; to more strongly state what I have been thinking about for a few years (or more) now; and to give a stronger attitude to the breastfeeding “movement” or parenting choice. If you don’t agree, then kudos to you for having an opinion. Share your thoughts if they are productive, critical, AND respectful. Bonus points if your thoughts are funny. I surely try to be all those. I am a mother, a graduate student in Early Education, and am absolutely NOT a medical professional in any way. I do have a great deal of common sense (which I ‘ve found to not be so common) and feel that sometimes, I need to share a bit of that with the world.
First, let me tell you that I am not currently breastfeeding my son. He is 23 months old, and is too busy to be bothered to sit down for a feeding. We ended our breastfeeding partnership on August 10, 2006, with a mutual decision that it was time. (He only nursed in the middle of the night, and he started to sleep through the night on his own.) That said, I want to share (or at least write this down for myself) why I am so adamant that all mothers should commit to breastfeeding their children for at least 6 months.
I abide by the laws of parenthood. These are:
1. Parenthood is inconvenient.
2. Parenthood is humbling.
3. Parenthood is expensive.
4. Parenthood is a learning experience (everyday in every way).
5. Parenthood doesn’t require us to be perfect, but does require us to do our best.
I also abide by the laws of breastfeeding. These are:
1. Breastmilk is free.
2. Breastmilk is best.
3. Breastmilk is (almost) always available, in the amount my baby needs to grow and develop.
4. Breastfeeding is only difficult if you make it difficult (most often).
5. Breastmilk is mobile (and doesn’t have to always come straight from breast to mouth!)
We, as humans, were created much like the animals that surround us. We carry our offspring in utero for almost a year, and give birth to small, helpless infants. These babies rely on us, and by ‘us’ I focus mostly on mothers at least for the first months to a year, for everything necessary for survival and bonding.
This includes milk. Our bodies produce it, regardless of whether we plan to use it or not. This milk is designed, by God, by Nature, by our bodies (pick one or more) as a perfect first food for our child. It’s amazing! It contains all the necessary nutrients for a human being, and includes extras like our adult antibodies to protect our children from illness and infection. This milk is also the most easily digested food, as it is quickly absorbed by the baby’s digestive tract, and does little to no damage to anything it touches. (On the inside or outside of our new little people). Mother’s milk gives a newborn child a taste of what the mother is currently eating, which gives them an introduction into the culinary culture they are born into. Babies already have had a taste of these foods while being carried in the uterus, as the amniotic fluid contains many of the same spices, flavors and aromatics that our adult diets are rich in. (Just ask a delivering OB doctor if they’ve ever delivered a child from a mother who eats a lot of garlic or cumin- both aromas have been noted as present in the amniotic fluid.)
Okay, so we’ve got the milk for our babies. I know, for lots of us, the milk comes in late (mine came in on my son’s fourth day of life - a girlfriend’s milk came in on her daughter’s ninth day) and we are forced to use a stand-in (a.k.a. formula). I don’t think that formula used in this way is a bad thing. Formula is a way that we can make sure our children will survive until our milk supply arrives in a sustainable amount for our babies to grow and develop with. I can understand that there are many women/ new mothers out there that don’t have a great support system out there for nursing. My own mother was a La Leche League leader, and I still felt a bit “on my own” when defending my “choice” to others.
For those women who feel like nursing won’t be well tolerated by those around you, so you choose formula instead, then why are you becoming a parent? I mean, seriously, I have had to make decisions every day of my son’s life that meant that those around me might not love what we are doing. That, in and of itself, is a big part of parenting: doing what is best for your child regardless of how the rest of the group, community, state, country reacts. Right? If your baby has a dirty diaper, would you consider not changing it because the sight or smell of it will infringe on someone else’s comfort? No! You just make sure you are in a more private location, that’s all. If my son is screaming for a toy or a candy bar at Target, should I cave in and buy him one because his behavior is making the people around me uncomfortable? No! And most of those around you are not actually uncomfortable, but are thinking back to their own lives when they were in the same position.
And, then I wonder, what if these “hesitant to breastfeed” women just need someone out there to lean on? Ask questions of? Make sure they are normal? Keep from totally freaking out? Well, I say, then all you have to do is talk to another mother. I have found that MOST mothers have at least tried breastfeeding. If I already know that someone thinks (crazily) that breastfeeding is gross or whatever, then I don’t talk with them about any issues I’m having, because they will most likely just tell me to stop and use formula. Mothering groups (MOPS, MOMs, etc.) are great support systems where mothers get together to talk about how challenging and rewarding parenthood can be. Neighbors are great sources of help and information. And, well, the INTERNET is also always there. Seek out reliable sources. There are La Leche League meetings, usually about once a month in most communities around the nation. There are also Early Childhood/ Family Education programs (also known as ECFE) that can either provide you with support or connect you with someone who can. Most hospitals now have a permanent lactation consultant available for large blocks of time everyday, if not twenty-four hours. Really, all you have to do is ask and “ye shall receive.”
So you figure that you can probably find people to support breastfeeding, but what’s in it for you?
1. Well, the best thing that I got out of it was weight loss. I weighed about 148lbs. when I conceived my son, and then gained about 35 pounds during my pregnancy. After my son and I had gotten the hang of breastfeeding, and were getting pretty good at it, I noticed that I had lost weight. Throughout my almost two years of breastfeeding, I maintained a weight of about 133lbs. I do NOT diet, though I try to eat the best, balanced diet I can. I love sweets, and for the first months of my son’s life, I ate anything that I could hold with one hand. *Sad to say that my 3 months post-lactation have allow me to put back that glorious 15lbs.
2. Another great by-product of breastfeeding is that it helps to balance your hormones a lot faster after pregnancy. I do not intend to make you believe that if you breastfeed, you will not have to worry about having the baby blues, or sliding much deeper into post-partum depression. But breastfeeding does have some notable effects on that whole continuum, and fewer mothers describe experiencing greater depression symptoms if they are breastfeeding.
3. You become tuned in to your baby’s needs. Your body will, at first, instinctively jump into milk production mode every time your little bundle makes a wanton squeek. After a few weeks to months, your body relies more on your ears to hear for the differences between cries or communications. You will know that every time you feed your child, and attend to her/his needs, you are creating a world for her/him that is dependable and safe. You will not need to set your hungry and sad infant down as you mix up a bottle of formula. You will just need to find a comfortable spot to sit and snuggle for about 10-15 minutes (on average). And how many times do we, as women, take a fifteen minute break from the world to just sit and adore our little creation? Those first years fly by, amazingly without much sleep on our part, and we will never again know the joy of holding our small daughter or son, as they sleep with a full and contented belly.
4. You won't have to pack bottles, formula, water, and all that stuff when you travel (or go shopping, or to the doctor, or to a friend's). All you'll need are baby's regular supplies, and breastpads. And isn't it already amazing enough all the gear your baby seems to need?
5. A big benefit for everyone involved: it's free. And not only will you save the $$$ otherwise to be spent on formula, you'll also be saving the environment from all the wastes and energies spent making and transporting formula. No cans to store in your always too small kitchen cabinets. No tracking to make sure you have enough on hand. No coupons to clip. No testing new formulas to see if one works better for your baby. (Though some women may need to alter their diets a bit to make baby's tummy a little happier.)
Some may tell you that formula fed babies will sleep through the night. There is little proof to this myth, and one should note that the medical phrase “sleeping through the night” only requires that a child sleep for five consequtive hours. The thought behind formula creating longer sleepers may lie partly in the fact that formula in difficult for small digestive systems to utilize. It sits in the digestive system for longer periods, and may cause a child to feel hungry less often. Formula is linked to more digestive issues, such as constipation, gas, spitting up, and offensive odors of both spit-up AND bowel movements.
Breastfed babies may require feedings to occur more often, but are more relaxed once fed, and have fewer issues with digestion. And, over my years of caring for many other babies, the whole poo and burp smell issues are well founded and backed by the sweet smell of a breastfed baby!
So if you are thinking of breastfeeding, by all means DO IT! You'll never feel regret that you made this choice, and you'll be amazed by all the wonderful benefits that it gives you.
Oh, and husbands enjoy the benefits of a breastfeeding wife: a) larger breasts b) taking on their responsibility to 'train' the baby to take a bottle (mom's can't really do this since they are the source of the milk) c) bigger boobs d) a happier baby e) bigger boobs f) thinner wife ...etc.
*Each parent has a myriad of choices when they enter into this whole parenthood thing. As my husband and I entered into parenthood with our first (and currently only) child, I began to realize the lack of grrrl power behind the idea of breastfeeding. I am a breastfeeding advocate, who does her best each day in regards to raising a capable and compassionate son, being a productive world citizen, and being a fun person to be around. This essay was written to help me put my feelings into words; to more strongly state what I have been thinking about for a few years (or more) now; and to give a stronger attitude to the breastfeeding “movement” or parenting choice. If you don’t agree, then kudos to you for having an opinion. Share your thoughts if they are productive, critical, AND respectful. Bonus points if your thoughts are funny. I surely try to be all those. I am a mother, a graduate student in Early Education, and am absolutely NOT a medical professional in any way. I do have a great deal of common sense (which I ‘ve found to not be so common) and feel that sometimes, I need to share a bit of that with the world.
First, let me tell you that I am not currently breastfeeding my son. He is 23 months old, and is too busy to be bothered to sit down for a feeding. We ended our breastfeeding partnership on August 10, 2006, with a mutual decision that it was time. (He only nursed in the middle of the night, and he started to sleep through the night on his own.) That said, I want to share (or at least write this down for myself) why I am so adamant that all mothers should commit to breastfeeding their children for at least 6 months.
I abide by the laws of parenthood. These are:
1. Parenthood is inconvenient.
2. Parenthood is humbling.
3. Parenthood is expensive.
4. Parenthood is a learning experience (everyday in every way).
5. Parenthood doesn’t require us to be perfect, but does require us to do our best.
I also abide by the laws of breastfeeding. These are:
1. Breastmilk is free.
2. Breastmilk is best.
3. Breastmilk is (almost) always available, in the amount my baby needs to grow and develop.
4. Breastfeeding is only difficult if you make it difficult (most often).
5. Breastmilk is mobile (and doesn’t have to always come straight from breast to mouth!)
We, as humans, were created much like the animals that surround us. We carry our offspring in utero for almost a year, and give birth to small, helpless infants. These babies rely on us, and by ‘us’ I focus mostly on mothers at least for the first months to a year, for everything necessary for survival and bonding.
This includes milk. Our bodies produce it, regardless of whether we plan to use it or not. This milk is designed, by God, by Nature, by our bodies (pick one or more) as a perfect first food for our child. It’s amazing! It contains all the necessary nutrients for a human being, and includes extras like our adult antibodies to protect our children from illness and infection. This milk is also the most easily digested food, as it is quickly absorbed by the baby’s digestive tract, and does little to no damage to anything it touches. (On the inside or outside of our new little people). Mother’s milk gives a newborn child a taste of what the mother is currently eating, which gives them an introduction into the culinary culture they are born into. Babies already have had a taste of these foods while being carried in the uterus, as the amniotic fluid contains many of the same spices, flavors and aromatics that our adult diets are rich in. (Just ask a delivering OB doctor if they’ve ever delivered a child from a mother who eats a lot of garlic or cumin- both aromas have been noted as present in the amniotic fluid.)
Okay, so we’ve got the milk for our babies. I know, for lots of us, the milk comes in late (mine came in on my son’s fourth day of life - a girlfriend’s milk came in on her daughter’s ninth day) and we are forced to use a stand-in (a.k.a. formula). I don’t think that formula used in this way is a bad thing. Formula is a way that we can make sure our children will survive until our milk supply arrives in a sustainable amount for our babies to grow and develop with. I can understand that there are many women/ new mothers out there that don’t have a great support system out there for nursing. My own mother was a La Leche League leader, and I still felt a bit “on my own” when defending my “choice” to others.
For those women who feel like nursing won’t be well tolerated by those around you, so you choose formula instead, then why are you becoming a parent? I mean, seriously, I have had to make decisions every day of my son’s life that meant that those around me might not love what we are doing. That, in and of itself, is a big part of parenting: doing what is best for your child regardless of how the rest of the group, community, state, country reacts. Right? If your baby has a dirty diaper, would you consider not changing it because the sight or smell of it will infringe on someone else’s comfort? No! You just make sure you are in a more private location, that’s all. If my son is screaming for a toy or a candy bar at Target, should I cave in and buy him one because his behavior is making the people around me uncomfortable? No! And most of those around you are not actually uncomfortable, but are thinking back to their own lives when they were in the same position.
And, then I wonder, what if these “hesitant to breastfeed” women just need someone out there to lean on? Ask questions of? Make sure they are normal? Keep from totally freaking out? Well, I say, then all you have to do is talk to another mother. I have found that MOST mothers have at least tried breastfeeding. If I already know that someone thinks (crazily) that breastfeeding is gross or whatever, then I don’t talk with them about any issues I’m having, because they will most likely just tell me to stop and use formula. Mothering groups (MOPS, MOMs, etc.) are great support systems where mothers get together to talk about how challenging and rewarding parenthood can be. Neighbors are great sources of help and information. And, well, the INTERNET is also always there. Seek out reliable sources. There are La Leche League meetings, usually about once a month in most communities around the nation. There are also Early Childhood/ Family Education programs (also known as ECFE) that can either provide you with support or connect you with someone who can. Most hospitals now have a permanent lactation consultant available for large blocks of time everyday, if not twenty-four hours. Really, all you have to do is ask and “ye shall receive.”
So you figure that you can probably find people to support breastfeeding, but what’s in it for you?
1. Well, the best thing that I got out of it was weight loss. I weighed about 148lbs. when I conceived my son, and then gained about 35 pounds during my pregnancy. After my son and I had gotten the hang of breastfeeding, and were getting pretty good at it, I noticed that I had lost weight. Throughout my almost two years of breastfeeding, I maintained a weight of about 133lbs. I do NOT diet, though I try to eat the best, balanced diet I can. I love sweets, and for the first months of my son’s life, I ate anything that I could hold with one hand. *Sad to say that my 3 months post-lactation have allow me to put back that glorious 15lbs.
2. Another great by-product of breastfeeding is that it helps to balance your hormones a lot faster after pregnancy. I do not intend to make you believe that if you breastfeed, you will not have to worry about having the baby blues, or sliding much deeper into post-partum depression. But breastfeeding does have some notable effects on that whole continuum, and fewer mothers describe experiencing greater depression symptoms if they are breastfeeding.
3. You become tuned in to your baby’s needs. Your body will, at first, instinctively jump into milk production mode every time your little bundle makes a wanton squeek. After a few weeks to months, your body relies more on your ears to hear for the differences between cries or communications. You will know that every time you feed your child, and attend to her/his needs, you are creating a world for her/him that is dependable and safe. You will not need to set your hungry and sad infant down as you mix up a bottle of formula. You will just need to find a comfortable spot to sit and snuggle for about 10-15 minutes (on average). And how many times do we, as women, take a fifteen minute break from the world to just sit and adore our little creation? Those first years fly by, amazingly without much sleep on our part, and we will never again know the joy of holding our small daughter or son, as they sleep with a full and contented belly.
4. You won't have to pack bottles, formula, water, and all that stuff when you travel (or go shopping, or to the doctor, or to a friend's). All you'll need are baby's regular supplies, and breastpads. And isn't it already amazing enough all the gear your baby seems to need?
5. A big benefit for everyone involved: it's free. And not only will you save the $$$ otherwise to be spent on formula, you'll also be saving the environment from all the wastes and energies spent making and transporting formula. No cans to store in your always too small kitchen cabinets. No tracking to make sure you have enough on hand. No coupons to clip. No testing new formulas to see if one works better for your baby. (Though some women may need to alter their diets a bit to make baby's tummy a little happier.)
Some may tell you that formula fed babies will sleep through the night. There is little proof to this myth, and one should note that the medical phrase “sleeping through the night” only requires that a child sleep for five consequtive hours. The thought behind formula creating longer sleepers may lie partly in the fact that formula in difficult for small digestive systems to utilize. It sits in the digestive system for longer periods, and may cause a child to feel hungry less often. Formula is linked to more digestive issues, such as constipation, gas, spitting up, and offensive odors of both spit-up AND bowel movements.
Breastfed babies may require feedings to occur more often, but are more relaxed once fed, and have fewer issues with digestion. And, over my years of caring for many other babies, the whole poo and burp smell issues are well founded and backed by the sweet smell of a breastfed baby!
So if you are thinking of breastfeeding, by all means DO IT! You'll never feel regret that you made this choice, and you'll be amazed by all the wonderful benefits that it gives you.
Oh, and husbands enjoy the benefits of a breastfeeding wife: a) larger breasts b) taking on their responsibility to 'train' the baby to take a bottle (mom's can't really do this since they are the source of the milk) c) bigger boobs d) a happier baby e) bigger boobs f) thinner wife ...etc.
Labels: best practice, breastfeeding, breastfeeding bitch, breastmilk, health, milk, mother, parenthood
¶ 2:33 PM
